Part III: Peace

SPEAKING OF HEALTH… Though I might not have the biggest circle of friends here, my social life still feels healthy.  I suppose a large number of friends is not what’s been needed.  Rather, over the past 6 months, I’ve spent many moments and days solo.  Out walking, exploring, reading, drawing, watching videos, and striving to learn more.  My time here’s been an attempt to fall more completely into knowing and loving the self, and accepting what is… 

So I’ve accepted with gratefulness that I’m 32 years old and haven’t chosen to settle down in any one place.  With gracefulness I’ve also realized that I’m not yet building up a retirement plan (or, what do you call them, 401-K?).  To think of the future is realistic and mature.  To settle into a mediocre life routine that works merely for the future, with the great hope of enjoying and embracing life’s fun when the kids are grown and we’re retired… In my opinion, that’s just taking too much for granted.  Not to judge anyone who’s comfortably settled.  Hats off to all who follow their hearts!  Having a house is probably a very comforting feeling.  I appreciate going back for holidays and summers to find a house full of loving family, great food, and incredible, rejuvenating warmth. When I’m in a regular place, it feels nice. 

Here I am, attempting to maintain enough money for the unforeseen emergency, period of joblessness, or desire to travel.  I’m already on the cusp of another transitional period, between jobs and places.  A few years ago, this may have caused in me anxiety and worry.  Now, it’s a blessing, because it’s my life.   As I stride into the unknown, there are infinite doors before me.  I may not be the epitome of stability, but I do work hard to maintain the inner space.  Our inner spaces can be filled with so many things, depending on what we allow for.  If we cultivate love and happiness, the space becomes a bright, shining light, giving us flexibility, compassion, and understanding.  If we ignore that inner space, it’s quickly filled with darkness and muck, veiling our senses, holding us back. 

This present situation has ended up being a time of tremendous, heart-opening growth.  Thanks to a life-changing University course titled Spiritual Development (in which I enrolled twice, because the instructor, program, and class were that good), I’ve learned and cultivated various spiritual practices and ways that have shown me how to more fully embrace life and experiences.  I’ve also been blessed with some incredible Spiritual Teachers over the past ten years. 

When we open our hearts and welcome, we’re able to receive signs.  These signs lead us down our own natural paths.  Be they people, emotions, or experiences, these signs from which we can learn… are always there.  We need only open our minds and hearts to them.  In turn, one begins to notice the effect of this open heart on others.  The world seems friendly, everything and everyone becomes more beautiful, and everything in life flows, as it’s naturally inclined to. 

What’s the point of any spiritual practice, and to where will these so-called paths lead us?  Beyond acceptance of all that is present, beyond realization of life’s impermanent beauty… May we move toward PEACE.